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This weekend we saw the first real snow here in Santa Fe. With “real” meaning, that it actually stuck to the ground instead of being evaporated by the (almost) ever-present sun. It’s a welcome change of scenery. Unfortunately it also means that the roads are covered in snow. And with that Santa Feans are magically divided into two distinct species.

First, let’s meet Carla Cautious. She drives an old Subaru. Green. Can’t see the color of the car in the back, because of all the “Defoliate the Bushes” stickers. One of her tires is dangerously deflated and the rest of them have as much tread as my flip-flops. Also can’t see through the back windows into the car, because of all the dog slobber on those windows. She’s a careful driver, sticks to the speed limit, does 22 mph in 25 mph zone. When Carla sees snow on the road, she immediately shifts into snail-gear and travels with 5 mph through the city.

Second, there’s Rick Rambo. He drives one of those 7.1L Hemi Dodge Ram Heavy Duty trucks. When he takes off at a light it sounds like a plane is taking off. He has a sticker with a little boy peeing on a Ford logo. His window is open and you can see him up there in a cabin wearing just a t-shirt. Rick drives like his truck lays tracks right in front of him. His speed is always over the limit and he purchased a season ticket to cross red lights. When Rick sees snow, he thinks it’s just an illusion. His speed does not change at all when the seasons change.

Strange that so few people fall in between Carla and Rick. Good luck to all of you out there! You’ll need it!